Trixie and Nigel discover how to lure a #knucker from a #knuckerhole and find out just how important it is to #washyourhands
As me, Nigel and my good friend Oli set off on our #knuckerhunt, we were wondered what we might find. Neither me nor Oli, or Nigel for that matter, had ever set our eyes on a knucker and we were unsure how the creature might react to our presence. Our adventure was to begin at St Mary Magdalene's Church where we hoped to find out more about the #KnuckerofLyminster.
A knucker is a type of #waterdragon (you can find out more about knuckers here). This specific one lived in #Lyminster in a knuckerhole which is a pool of water with immense depths, some say bottomless. Back in the day the locals knew to stay away as it was believed to be the the lair of a mighty knucker who's favourite food was fair maidens.
This knucker was a particularly greedy one, and he ate ALL the fair maidens in the land. All bar one; the daughter of the King of Sussex. The King said if anyone could kill the monster then his daughter and half the Kingdom would be theirs. As so many lame old stories go, along came a brave Knight who saves the day by slaying the dragon and marrying the princess. When the dragon slayer eventually died he was buried in the grounds of #StMaryMagdalenesChurch. His gravestone called #TheSlayersStone is still there today, it was one of the things that we were hoping to find.
But the story of the Knucker of Lyminster doesn't finish there.... Let's fast forward some years to a time half way between then and now, and there was a boy. His name was #JimPuttock and he was the farmer's boy from the #villageofWick. So much time had passed that the story of the knucker, the fair maidens and the brave knight had almost been forgotten. All Jim knew about the knuckerhole is that it was said to be bottomless, and he didn't believe it! He was sure he could find the bottom.
One day, Jim and his friends broke into the nearby church and stole the church bell. They tied six extra lengths of rope to the bell and lowered it into the water. They extended it down but the knuckerhole was so deep that they ran out of rope before the bell found the bottom. They gave up and went home. Little did they know that they had disturbed something that had been lying sill in the deep, dark depths of the knuckerhole for a very long time, something that was almost certainly best left undisturbed.
We shall come back to this story later, but first let me tell you a little bit about St Mary Magdalene's Church where we had just arrived. We parked up outside the little church in #Tortington, excited to see two things - the Slayers Stone and the famous stained glass window depicting the horrifying Knucker of Lyminster.
Nigel bounded through the archway onto the church grounds excited to start our adventure. As he approached the entrance to the church, however, it was clear that something was wrong. He couldn't get in. The door was shut with CHURCH CLOSED written across the noticeboard. He stared at it, his dog like literacy skills making it difficult to decipher the issue. I tried to explain to him that he wouldn't have been allowed in anyway due to the fact he is a dog, and he just sat there like a good boy, wagging his tail in response.
The place was eerily quiet. Why was the church shut? Was it due to the pandemic and everything being shut because of Covid-19, or was it something more? Perhaps the town was in hiding. Perhaps the knucker was on the loose once more.
I'm not going to lie, this has scuppered our plans. The Slayers Stone had been moved into the church some years ago to protect it from weathering and the stained glass window sits on an internal wall, not visible from the outside. We peered through the window trying to see something, any thing, but all we could see was fluffy beasts strewn across the windowsill. Perhaps they were used to warn local children of the perils of the knuckerhole? I took them as proof we were on the right track.
If we had been able to see the stained glass window we would have seen the fearsome knucker between two angels representing sun and moon, being defeated by Jim Puttock. Here is what we would have seen. But I am getting ahead of myself, I'll tell you more about that later.
We were determined not to be downhearted, we would come back and see it another day and in the meantime we would move on to the next part, and far more exciting part, of our adventure - finding the knuckerhole.
If you want to find the knuckerhole for yourself then it's just a short walk from the church. However these days you can't see much. It's now on private land and sits behind a fence so you can't get very close. This is probably to stop locals from disturbing the knucker again and causing murder and misery all over the lands. The closest we managed to get was the what3words location - maps.flooding.midwinter.
We knew we were getting close to the knuckerhole when Nigel started getting agitated. The sun was high in the sky but the heat didn't seem to reach us, the temperature was dropping. The wind stopped and there was a damp, foul smell in their air. Nigel barked and signalled at a break in the bushes which Nigel, Oli and I proceeded to climb through. We were knucker-hunting amateurs and all we had with us was pie. I peered through the fence and could just about make out the knuckerhole. It was time to get it out.
Why pie? Well.... let me go back to the story. What Jim and his friends disturbed at the bottom of the knuckerhole that day was indeed the knucker. I don't know what had happened. Had the Knight lied about killing the knucker and instead somehow convinced him to leave the last fair maiden alone and stay in his knuckerhole? Did the knucker have a little knucker baby that was now all grown up? Either way, there was a knucker in the knuckerhole that was awake. The next day the villagers awoke to devastation, Their land had been ravaged and their livestock eaten. The village was in uproar.
Weeks went by, months went by, and the knucker continued to cause havoc. As the beast slithered through the lands his giant tail would sweep across fields destroying whatever harvest lay in it's tracks. It would gobble up sheep, cows and horses. Dogs would bark trying to warn their owners that the knucker was coming, but his deadly hissing tongue would lap up and devour anything in it's path, dogs included. Every night and day the sound of cracking bones would be heard for miles around. The villagers were running out of food and the smell of rotting carcasses got worse day by day.
Jim knew that something had to be done. He knew that that night he and his friends had done something they should not. He was responsible for awakening the beast, and he needed to be the one to destroy it. Luckily, Jim Puttock was a Sussex boy and Sussex boys were cunning. He had a plan and he went to the Mayor of #Arundel to tell him what they must do.
The Mayor had no choice but to listen, Jim was the only one with a plan. He told the villagers to give Jim whatever he needed and to not complain about how much it would cost them. They should just be grateful that Jim is going to save them from the monster.
Jim asked the blacksmith to forge him the biggest iron pot, the miller for all the flour he had, the dairy farmer for all the butter he could churn and the villagers collected all the apples left in the farmer's orchard. He chopped and spiced and kneaded and rolled and finally he asked the woodsman to collect all his wood to build a huge fire in the village square. As Jim cooked his giant pie on the fire the sweet smell wafted across the lands and the starving villagers felt their bellies rumble. When no one was looking, he added the secret ingredient.
It was the biggest #sussexpie anyone had ever seen. It was so big that it needed to be put on a huge cart and be pulled by two horses. He was finally ready. He took a deep breath, summoning all the bravery he could muster, and he set off towards the knuckerhole. The villagers walked with him as far as they dared. They stopped where the winding path began that headed straight into the #dragonslair.
They watched in silence as Jim began walking down the path toward almost certain death. It was clear he was headed in the right direction because bones and animal parts were strewn along the track and there was a rotten smell in the air. The wind rustled through the long reeds that surrounded the path and the wooden wheels of the cart creaked under the heavy load of the pie, bones cracking under the horses footsteps.
It wasn't long before Jim could see the knuckerhole, but before he could reach it the wind stopped, the reeds stood still, vapour rose from the water and all he could see was two big eyes.
"How do, Dragon?" said Jim, in the bravest and least-wobbly voice he could manage.
"What do you want?" asked the knucker, his deep rumbling voice shaking the ground under Jim's feet.
"I want to give you this pie" replied Jim, "the villagers made it for you in the hope that it would fill you up and you would stop eating our animals and destroying our crops."
The knucker laughed. "You think that is going to fill ME up?" The vapour slowly settled unveiling a monstrous 30 foot long serpent-like creature with blood coloured scales. When he laughed his giant dagger-like teeth shone in the dim light. The knucker wrapped his huge tail around Jim, blocking his escape.
"I really do Mr Knucker sir. It really is the most tasty sussex pie, my mother's recipe, please won't you try it?" pleaded Jim. The knucker smiled and with one long claw he picked out the bone of a cow that was stuck between his teeth.
"I'll try it", replied the knucker, "but it won't fill me up, so then I will eat you too", and he laughed again and the ground shook. He opened up his giant hissing sea-serpent's mouth and ate the pie, the cart and the horses in one big bite.
"It is but a snack!" laughed the knucker, but the laughing suddenly stopped. Rage filled him.
"Why does it burn?" he clutched at his stomach in pain. The knucker began to writhe around on the floor, screaming. Jim had laced the pie with poison and it wasn't long before the knucker's writhing slowed and the knucker was still. The Knucker was dead.
Now, there are some variations of this story, and I always thought it was strange that the monster's body was never found. Some say that the poisoned pie actually only gave the dragon a bad stomach and as he clutched his tummy and crawled back into his knuckerhole he did a giant fart that was so big it was heard, felt and smelt across the whole of the world! They say he now waits in the depths of his knuckerhole for the day his tummy stops to stop hurting. This is why the pond sometimes bubbles and gives off a terrible smell. Who knows the truth, but that's why we were there, we wanted to find out.
As I got my Sussex Pie out my rucksack I have to admit, it was pretty lame. It wasn't even as big as my head and it had been a bit squashed in my bag. It looked tasty nevertheless, and I was still excited. If there was a knucker still in the knuckerhole then hopefully this would lure him out.
I waved the pie around trying to waft the smell in the direction of the knuckerhole, but alas, nothing, nada. After hanging around for a bit we thought it best to get moving. We decided to explore the local area as we might catch it out hunting for it's lunch. I know two things now that I did not know then. Number one - it's best to hunt for knuckers early morning, it was now after midday. Number two - when hunting for them, do not wear brightly coloured clothes. #Dragonology, Tracking & Taming Dragons, A Guide for Beginners, clearly states,
"An ability to blend in with the natural environment so that the tracker becomes almost invisible may be a life saver"
So even if we had gone at the right time, my brightly coloured attire could have got us killed if we had encountered one. But we didn't know that at the time and we we carried on hunting.
Knuckers like to travel through water so we kept close to the streams that eventually flowed into the #riverArun, keeping an eye out for knuckers. We were heading for #Arundel. A visit to #ArundelCastle was next on our list of things to do not only because it is an awesome #castle that is epic to say the least, but because we thought the they might be able to give us some local knowledge on the knucker.
As we approached the giant gated entrance of Arundel Castle our hearts sank. To our dismay, it was shut. Thwarted again! It was a Monday, and apparently the castle is always closed on a Monday. Darn it.
Well, not to worry! Last on our list of things to do was visit the Six Bells pub so we would head there. Which reminds me, I haven't finished my story.
Jim couldn't believe his eyes, it had worked! The beast was dead! He headed straight to the local pub to spread the news. Yes, you guessed it, the #SixBellspub. As he walked through the door the pub fell silent and all eyes were on Jim.
"It worked, the knucker is dead!" he exclaimed. Everyone jumped out of their chairs and cheered, raising their glasses to Jim and dancing around for joy. Pint after pint was poured for Jim as everyone sat around and listened to the story of how he tricked the dragon into eating the giant poisoned Sussex Pie. The Six Bell's pub made the finest Sussex Pie around and he ordered one to celebrate.
He polished off the delicious pie in just a few mouthfuls. Killing knuckers is hard work and builds up quite an appetite. With a big smile on his face and his stomach full he wiped his hand over his mouth. This proved to be a big mistake. A fatal one. Poor old Jim hadn't washed his hands after making the poisoned pie and he dropped down, dead. And that was the unfortunate end to Jim Puttock. Remember guys - #alwayswashyourhands
We headed to the Six Bells ready to remember Jim and raise a glass to his cunning plan and his unfortunate end. Whether he killed the knucker or not, he managed to save the villagers from the monster and teach them the valuable lesson of always washing their hands before eating, a tradition that we still hold to this day.
We pulled up in the car park but there were no other cars to be seen. The place was shut, a big sign outside reading "Closed on Mondays". Darn. Triple whammy! The church was closed, the castle was closed and now the pub was closed.
We got out the car and had a look around anyway. Then I remembered, the pie! Unlike Jim's pie, I hadn't poisoned this one and we were starving. Oli, Nigel and I found a nice place to sit and shared the tasty Sussex pie whilst promising each other that next time we go #knuckerhunting we would check opening times. Maybe next time we will have more luck.
We also know so much more about knuckers now and have since featured knuckers in Creature of the Week, so if you want to do your own knucker hunting I would advise that you read here first.
If you would like to bake your own Sussex Pie you can find a recipe here, and here are links to The Church, The Knuckerhole, Arundel Castle and The Six Bells pub - just remember, don't visit on a Monday!
If you have gone on your own knucker hunting adventure and/or have your own knucker hunting tips, please feel free to tell us about it below.
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